One of the things I emphasize in therapy is the need to discover "what works" in calming, soothing, and relaxing you which does NOT also involve a destructive or self-destructive substance and/or process. This also applies to whatever works in energizing, motivating, and stimulating you. I know it may sound strange to put it this way, but not everyone gets it about how to change their mood, anxiety level, or feelings without involving something that is "bad"for them or someone else. For example, the act of arguing with another person actually does end up releasing endorphins when the fight is "over" because of how much energy (albiet negative!) was expended during the fighting process. It's like getting a good workout, but in a very bad and wrong kind of way. You are exhausted, you are tired, and yet---you are relaxed and much calmer once the drama is finally over. This "link" is often ignored by those who don't initially understand me when I ask if they may be addicted to "drama, crisis, and chaos".
Fighting with someone else also has the potential to energize, motivate, and stimulate a person as well...once it begins that is. This is why disagreements can so easily escalate for so many people into knock down drag outs. Nobody is aware of or understanding the "pay off" that keeps them locked into the fight mode. You can feel "up" if you will (energized, etc.) and then "down" (calm and relaxed) all within whatever time frame the argument/fight covers. Which is, once again, why so many people become and stay "addicted" to fighting and arguing without understanding why. Now you know why. At least I hope you do.
Now imagine, if you will, the person who may struggle with a significant mental health issue. This, as one example, may be the person who suddenly finds themself feeling extremely irritated, angry, and "ready to blow" without anything "bad" happening to trigger it! How do you "change" that mood state when it may be what you feel before breakfast is even on the table!? Drink a red bull and chase it with a cup of coffee in hopes you'll feel calmer fast? Sounds crazy? Not really when you think about it. Caffeine does have a calming effect on those individuals who struggle with racing thoughts, inability to concentrate, lack of focus, etc. Did you know that "in the old days" of identifying whether or not a child had ADHD (attention-deficity hyperactivity disorder), parents were often told to give the child a cup of black coffee in the morning? If the child was able to focus and concentrate "better" as a result, ADHD could not be ruled out. I remember a client many years ago who would drink a full litre of Pepsi once he got to work and by lunchtime...and then another between noon and three p.m. In his case, he did have a major mood disorder as well as ADHD...but he certainly didn't link his caffeine addiction to his daily attempts at calming, relaxing, and soothing himself during a hard day at the office.
Finding what works to make you feel better "now" usually ends up involving unhealthy things when you aren't paying attention to yourself to the extent you should. Alcohol is NOT the only way to calm, relax, and soothe yourself before trying to fall asleep at night. What about picking up the most boring book in your house and reading it in bed? Or making sure the temperature in your bedroom is not too hot or not too cold (for you) first? There are all sorts of things you can do to help yourself accomplish your goals when it comes to changing your mood states...but when you do and then keep repeating the wrong thing---it's not a good thing. Ever.
For me personally, discovering "blogging" online has definitely assisted me in both energizing, motivating, and stimulating myself on demand....yet it also has the power to calm, soothe, and relax me as well. Which reminds me...it's time for bed. Good nite!
Fighting with someone else also has the potential to energize, motivate, and stimulate a person as well...once it begins that is. This is why disagreements can so easily escalate for so many people into knock down drag outs. Nobody is aware of or understanding the "pay off" that keeps them locked into the fight mode. You can feel "up" if you will (energized, etc.) and then "down" (calm and relaxed) all within whatever time frame the argument/fight covers. Which is, once again, why so many people become and stay "addicted" to fighting and arguing without understanding why. Now you know why. At least I hope you do.
Now imagine, if you will, the person who may struggle with a significant mental health issue. This, as one example, may be the person who suddenly finds themself feeling extremely irritated, angry, and "ready to blow" without anything "bad" happening to trigger it! How do you "change" that mood state when it may be what you feel before breakfast is even on the table!? Drink a red bull and chase it with a cup of coffee in hopes you'll feel calmer fast? Sounds crazy? Not really when you think about it. Caffeine does have a calming effect on those individuals who struggle with racing thoughts, inability to concentrate, lack of focus, etc. Did you know that "in the old days" of identifying whether or not a child had ADHD (attention-deficity hyperactivity disorder), parents were often told to give the child a cup of black coffee in the morning? If the child was able to focus and concentrate "better" as a result, ADHD could not be ruled out. I remember a client many years ago who would drink a full litre of Pepsi once he got to work and by lunchtime...and then another between noon and three p.m. In his case, he did have a major mood disorder as well as ADHD...but he certainly didn't link his caffeine addiction to his daily attempts at calming, relaxing, and soothing himself during a hard day at the office.
Finding what works to make you feel better "now" usually ends up involving unhealthy things when you aren't paying attention to yourself to the extent you should. Alcohol is NOT the only way to calm, relax, and soothe yourself before trying to fall asleep at night. What about picking up the most boring book in your house and reading it in bed? Or making sure the temperature in your bedroom is not too hot or not too cold (for you) first? There are all sorts of things you can do to help yourself accomplish your goals when it comes to changing your mood states...but when you do and then keep repeating the wrong thing---it's not a good thing. Ever.
For me personally, discovering "blogging" online has definitely assisted me in both energizing, motivating, and stimulating myself on demand....yet it also has the power to calm, soothe, and relax me as well. Which reminds me...it's time for bed. Good nite!