Yes, you read that right. Someone told me the other day about someone who posted this as part of their online dating profile. "I am ethically non-monogamous." Okay! Time to chat. Here we go...
To be ethical...and to be non-monogamous. Is that the same as....
"Incorruptibly corruptible"
"Intellectually vapid"
"Honestly dishonest"
"Thoughtfully sociopathic"
"Pro-life abortion advocate"
"Nutritionally-trained anorexic"
Need I go on? When we start describing ourselves and/or others like this....we are in desperate need of a reality check, just a reminder!
To be "ethically non-monogamous" translated means this: "I am more devoted to cheating than I am to being committed...to anyone."
Wow. Let's all message this person stat! Who wouldn't want to start dating and then sleeping with someone like that?! Too bad I'm married! :-P
I was watching a clip from an interview with Dr. Oz this morning. He featured a former teen idol who was part of a highly successful television sitcom back in the day. Unfortunately, this actor developed schizoaffective disorder since that time....and it showed. For those unfamiliar with this particular disorder, it represents as a combination of the symptoms typically associated with both bipolar disorder and schizophrenia. In other words, when there is a mood change, there is also a psychotic episode that occurs. These episodes last for at least two weeks at a time...and take place when one's mood changes "up" (mania), "down" (depression)---or simultaneously (feeling both "up" and "down" at the same time).
As the actor was sitting there, she was having a difficult time articulating her thoughts to Dr. Oz. No wonder why. When a person is schizoaffective, there is a whole other thought-based reality that competes for the reality which actually is. It is a highly disruptive form of mental illness to manage, since sufferers have to remain psychiatrically connected and medication compliant in spite of their ongoing battle with distorted and delusional thinking. Without remaining connected and compliant, there is little hope of someone with schizoaffective disorder to manage themselves successfully enough within the environment they inhabit. When a person is actively psychotic, they believe things that are not based on real life reality; they may also see, smell, hear, touch, or taste things that are literally figments of their own delusional mindset. It is a terrible disease and one that absolutely requires the right psychiatric intervention and continual monitoring utilizing the proper psychotropic medication.
Why have I shared this story here? I have shared it because "ethical non-monogamy" is its own form of delusional thinking, just sayin'! If you want to cheat on anyone you choose to be sexually involved with, call it for what it is. There are no ethics associated with anything humanity pursues that is potentially and/or absolutely harmful to another human being's mind, body, and spirit. The ethically non-monogamous among us may not realize it "now", but they are on a self-destructive path---and are merely seeking company to join them on that path when they do (via online dating).
So...next time you see or hear the term "ethically non-monogamous", stop and think about what that truly means. I did.
Until next post....