In the field of psychotherapy, everyone who comes through our doors ultimately struggles with feeling "lost", "stuck", or some combination of the two. No matter what an individual, couple, or family is suffering from----it does all boil down to whether one is feeling more powerless than aimless, more aimless than powerless, or both to varying degrees.
This week has been about my own personal initiation into the realm of "stuck". As in literal stuck. For those of us who live in SE MI, this has been the week from frozen tundra hell. I don't know where you live, but for those of us residing in the Midwest and Eastern seaboard states, we have been frozen solid. I never can remember in my adult life hearing that my local outside temperature was two below zero with a windchill of negative fifteen or twenty. But that happened this week too. When I went to go out briefly last night, I never made it out our driveway. Then when I called for a tow truck to pull me out, they wouldn't come because our dirt road and dead-end street hadn't been plowed and they weren't willing to risk the drive over. THEN when I called our county road commission this morning to plow our street, the man said "I can report it ma'am, but I can't tell you when they'll come to dig you out; we've been awfully busy this week." Yeah, right, whatever.
Needless to say this is day four of me being "stuck" in my own house and against my will. This hasn't felt good. As a matter of fact, it feels terribly uncomfortable. When I look out the window of my office as I am in this very moment, I don't see a "Currier and Ives" rendition of some winter wonderland. I see a white out. I feel claustrophobic. I feel like jumping out of my skin but there's nowhere to jump. I feel like I've been stranded in the middle of the arctic with no hope for "De Plane!" showing up anytime soon. I feel helpless, powerless, and tied up with a rope that has been wound around me tight from my toes to the top of my head.
So what have I done, as a good psychotherapist, to practice what I espose to my clients when they struggle with their own "stuck" status? First, I got sick and was prescribed a Z-Pack. I read some hilarious books. (Might I recommend David Sedaris' latest: "Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls", which is truly gut-splitting!) I played Candy Crush Saga to level 32. I laid in the bed and talked on the phone. I watched "One Step Beyond" episodes on Matinee Classics t.v. for free. I made dinners. I did everything I could think of that was non-productive but made the time pass anyway. And then I got sick of being sick and stuck. I prepared for a meeting I have tomorrow morning; I confirmed all my client appointments for the rest of this week; I started writing this blogpost. And I stopped feeling sorry for myself...and forged ahead anyway.
In my attempt to avoid another "stuck" phase like the one we just experienced, I suggested to my husband that we move to Maui, FL, and AZ for each month of December, January, and February next year. I can see my clients via Facetime or Skype. I can figure out where the dog will stay while we're in Maui and can't bring her with us. And I certainly can say goodbye to this form of being stuck once and for all. If Michigan is turning into Alaska before my very eyes, this is the LAST season I will allow myself to become frozen stiff over changes I can be better prepared for "next time". In the meantime, stay warm and positive! They say it's going to be in the 20's tomorrow...
Until next time...
This week has been about my own personal initiation into the realm of "stuck". As in literal stuck. For those of us who live in SE MI, this has been the week from frozen tundra hell. I don't know where you live, but for those of us residing in the Midwest and Eastern seaboard states, we have been frozen solid. I never can remember in my adult life hearing that my local outside temperature was two below zero with a windchill of negative fifteen or twenty. But that happened this week too. When I went to go out briefly last night, I never made it out our driveway. Then when I called for a tow truck to pull me out, they wouldn't come because our dirt road and dead-end street hadn't been plowed and they weren't willing to risk the drive over. THEN when I called our county road commission this morning to plow our street, the man said "I can report it ma'am, but I can't tell you when they'll come to dig you out; we've been awfully busy this week." Yeah, right, whatever.
Needless to say this is day four of me being "stuck" in my own house and against my will. This hasn't felt good. As a matter of fact, it feels terribly uncomfortable. When I look out the window of my office as I am in this very moment, I don't see a "Currier and Ives" rendition of some winter wonderland. I see a white out. I feel claustrophobic. I feel like jumping out of my skin but there's nowhere to jump. I feel like I've been stranded in the middle of the arctic with no hope for "De Plane!" showing up anytime soon. I feel helpless, powerless, and tied up with a rope that has been wound around me tight from my toes to the top of my head.
So what have I done, as a good psychotherapist, to practice what I espose to my clients when they struggle with their own "stuck" status? First, I got sick and was prescribed a Z-Pack. I read some hilarious books. (Might I recommend David Sedaris' latest: "Let's Explore Diabetes with Owls", which is truly gut-splitting!) I played Candy Crush Saga to level 32. I laid in the bed and talked on the phone. I watched "One Step Beyond" episodes on Matinee Classics t.v. for free. I made dinners. I did everything I could think of that was non-productive but made the time pass anyway. And then I got sick of being sick and stuck. I prepared for a meeting I have tomorrow morning; I confirmed all my client appointments for the rest of this week; I started writing this blogpost. And I stopped feeling sorry for myself...and forged ahead anyway.
In my attempt to avoid another "stuck" phase like the one we just experienced, I suggested to my husband that we move to Maui, FL, and AZ for each month of December, January, and February next year. I can see my clients via Facetime or Skype. I can figure out where the dog will stay while we're in Maui and can't bring her with us. And I certainly can say goodbye to this form of being stuck once and for all. If Michigan is turning into Alaska before my very eyes, this is the LAST season I will allow myself to become frozen stiff over changes I can be better prepared for "next time". In the meantime, stay warm and positive! They say it's going to be in the 20's tomorrow...
Until next time...