An old high school friend of mine suddenly died this past week after struggling for years with a variety of physical problems. She was one of those people who was eternally optimistic, preferred laughter over tears, and seemed to be always available to listen. When we lived together as teenagers, I remember her asking me to take her car one day over to the local McDonald's so as to get us a carryout. Her car at that time was this massive station wagon that had obviously seen better days. After parking the car and getting our order, I found it impossible to back out of the parking lot to return home. Back then, cell phones were just a dream; I had to think fast. I noticed a couple of guys our age in the parking lot and asked them to push the car out of the space for me and see if that didn't help. As it turned out, once the car was facing forward, I could drive it back to the house. When I arrived, my friend said "Hey, how come our food is cold!" I said, "Hey, how come your car doesn't drive in reverse?" Her reply, "Oh, I forgot to tell you about that!" We laughed and laughed; now she is gone having been taken way too early from this world we shared.
Life is full of messes and blessings. As I prepared to attend my friend's funeral visitation today, I watched bits and pieces of "Barney's Version", a 2010 film starring the actor Paul Giamatti. If ever there was a movie that presented what a series of messes and blessings can look like in a person's life, this one is it. Not unlike my friend, "Barney" makes a series of choices in his own life that resulted in a series of extremely positive---as well as extremely negative---outcomes. Not unlike you. Not unlike me. So long as we are here, we will believe things, feel things, and do things that aren't the best for us. That's just how it is. For those of us who want to "be" and "do" better, we must practice doing so every single day, which is a lot like swimming upstream. Complicating this process is the fact that what we, ourselves, "want" to improve on may not be what we get improved on in this lifetime. My friend struggled in recent years with being able to walk without the use of a walker or wheelchair; she died without realizing her goal. Yet her attitude was always positive. Which is the mess and which is the blessing in that case? To me, having and maintaining the right attitude in spite of our messes which don't go away is the biggest blessing.
Anyone who struggles with chronic insomnia understands the need for "peace" in order to sleep soundly. Anyone who struggles with an eating disorder understands the need for "peace" in another form in order to eat properly. We all have our demons. We all struggle with things we wish we didn't have to struggle with. Yet, in the end, cultivating peace both inside and out is a key regardless of what we can and can't control. When learning about and practicing peace is an ongoing personal pursuit, we won't go wrong. When we open the door to allowing inner peace into our lives, the rest that goes along with it comes also. Joy and patience come immediately to mind....just like what I saw present within my friend in spite of her personal circumstances.
We can rest in peace before we read R.I.P. on a gravestone. I am grateful that my friend knew Who to turn to in finding and practicing that peace before she was taken from this earth. Goodbye my friend...for now.
Life is full of messes and blessings. As I prepared to attend my friend's funeral visitation today, I watched bits and pieces of "Barney's Version", a 2010 film starring the actor Paul Giamatti. If ever there was a movie that presented what a series of messes and blessings can look like in a person's life, this one is it. Not unlike my friend, "Barney" makes a series of choices in his own life that resulted in a series of extremely positive---as well as extremely negative---outcomes. Not unlike you. Not unlike me. So long as we are here, we will believe things, feel things, and do things that aren't the best for us. That's just how it is. For those of us who want to "be" and "do" better, we must practice doing so every single day, which is a lot like swimming upstream. Complicating this process is the fact that what we, ourselves, "want" to improve on may not be what we get improved on in this lifetime. My friend struggled in recent years with being able to walk without the use of a walker or wheelchair; she died without realizing her goal. Yet her attitude was always positive. Which is the mess and which is the blessing in that case? To me, having and maintaining the right attitude in spite of our messes which don't go away is the biggest blessing.
Anyone who struggles with chronic insomnia understands the need for "peace" in order to sleep soundly. Anyone who struggles with an eating disorder understands the need for "peace" in another form in order to eat properly. We all have our demons. We all struggle with things we wish we didn't have to struggle with. Yet, in the end, cultivating peace both inside and out is a key regardless of what we can and can't control. When learning about and practicing peace is an ongoing personal pursuit, we won't go wrong. When we open the door to allowing inner peace into our lives, the rest that goes along with it comes also. Joy and patience come immediately to mind....just like what I saw present within my friend in spite of her personal circumstances.
We can rest in peace before we read R.I.P. on a gravestone. I am grateful that my friend knew Who to turn to in finding and practicing that peace before she was taken from this earth. Goodbye my friend...for now.