When I was a marketing consultant back in the day before grad school...I can recall one of my clients who was a celebrated stylist. As we were having coffee in his hotel, he gave me a print copy of his schedule for the week. (Yes, back then...no Smart phones...just paper!) I remember being blown away because his schedule began with "8:00AM...Wake up Sunshine!" Next, "8:30AM...Breakfast Now!" "900AM...Car At Curbside." ...and went on from there until the it was time for bed.
After I read through everything, I looked at him and asked what was up with having everything he had to do from sun up to bedtime being printed out like that? (Listen, I was quite young at the time, o.k.?) He laughed. He told me that without his schedule...he wouldn't remember to either watch or tape Wheel of Fortune when it came on at 7PM--which is what he really wanted to do before bed that evening. We cracked up. He made his point though; scheduling our daily life matters. Today's blog post presents the case for creating your own Life Schedule for your own sake!
We are notorious as people for giving ourselves away too often without thinking. We give away our time, our energies, and our resources without considering what "else" we have going on that day (or night!) or week or month. Unless you are a fireman (or woman!), you don't exist on this plant merely to put out other people's fires 24/7---or to make them feel good about themselves on demand---though the codependent giver within each of us grooves on this kind of thing. Neither do we exist to find any and every available opportunity to make ourselves feel good about ourselves when we are in our codependent taker mindset. When we avoid or don't follow through on our OWN daily load of responsibilities, be them personal or professional in nature, we WILL end up feeling more bad than good about ourselves---let alone those others who we eventually grow to resent and feel bitter towards.
The habit of life scheduling isn't about depressing yourself with all the things you must do every day at work that you'd rather not do. Life scheduling isn't about overwhelming yourself; it's about freeing yourself! When you know what you, yourself, are personally and professionally responsible for doing on any given day or night...you also "know" when you are free to do whatever else you choose within that same 24 hour period. You don't confuse your own personal responsibilities with those of one or more others. You don't fall prey to "dropping everything" in order to do something that truly isn't your own personal responsibility. You don't waste time trying to fix, save, or rescue others that you have no control over fixing, saving, or rescuing in the first place. You don't blow off your own real and legitimate priorities because you'd rather distract yourself or make yourself feel better about yourself "right now"...
Do I make my point? I hope so. You don't "owe" anybody your time, efforts, or energies because they thought to contact you first, second, or 32nd! Neither do other people, places, or things "owe" you experiences to make yourself feel good or better about yourself. There are other, more functional ways, to improve the quality of your inner life. And it is not at the expense of yourself...or other people. Newsflash: a "thing" to make you feel better fast may include those four beers or glasses of wine after work each day...that bucket of KFC....hitting up the casino for a couple of hours...going shopping....smoking that blunt...etc. etc. etc! If you want to get deep into it, it may also mean going home and starting a fight with your significant other so you don't have to "deal" with him or her the rest of the night. Think about THAT! ;-)
Some people are old skool about the tool they use to create and maintain their own life schedule. I, myself, have a detailed weekly planner I picked up at Office Depot for $25. It breaks down my day beginning at 7:00AM in 15 minute increments until 9:30PM. I can merely write in what I've got to do or have going on during any given day--and can instantly see what blocks of time are open for me throughout the day. I can also open up my planner and see at a glance my entire week from any given Monday through Sunday. That's what works for me. Someone else might choose to use their smartphone app. Others, a small notebook to jot down their necessary personal errands and social obligations for the week separate and apart from their work and device-related planner. Whatever you use to keep your life schedule going and current is your own choice.
Structure makes us feel safe. This is true whether we are 5 years old or 55 years old. Structure is what keeps us cruising within our own lane on a day to day basis. Nobody is SO disciplined that they are capable of mentally remembering everything they need to be doing on any given day. That would be delusional just sayin'.
Life scheduling is our friend. It truly is. If you need help with motivating yourself to pursue this process, that's what I'm here for. As the old saying goes, if nothing changes---nothing changes!
After I read through everything, I looked at him and asked what was up with having everything he had to do from sun up to bedtime being printed out like that? (Listen, I was quite young at the time, o.k.?) He laughed. He told me that without his schedule...he wouldn't remember to either watch or tape Wheel of Fortune when it came on at 7PM--which is what he really wanted to do before bed that evening. We cracked up. He made his point though; scheduling our daily life matters. Today's blog post presents the case for creating your own Life Schedule for your own sake!
We are notorious as people for giving ourselves away too often without thinking. We give away our time, our energies, and our resources without considering what "else" we have going on that day (or night!) or week or month. Unless you are a fireman (or woman!), you don't exist on this plant merely to put out other people's fires 24/7---or to make them feel good about themselves on demand---though the codependent giver within each of us grooves on this kind of thing. Neither do we exist to find any and every available opportunity to make ourselves feel good about ourselves when we are in our codependent taker mindset. When we avoid or don't follow through on our OWN daily load of responsibilities, be them personal or professional in nature, we WILL end up feeling more bad than good about ourselves---let alone those others who we eventually grow to resent and feel bitter towards.
The habit of life scheduling isn't about depressing yourself with all the things you must do every day at work that you'd rather not do. Life scheduling isn't about overwhelming yourself; it's about freeing yourself! When you know what you, yourself, are personally and professionally responsible for doing on any given day or night...you also "know" when you are free to do whatever else you choose within that same 24 hour period. You don't confuse your own personal responsibilities with those of one or more others. You don't fall prey to "dropping everything" in order to do something that truly isn't your own personal responsibility. You don't waste time trying to fix, save, or rescue others that you have no control over fixing, saving, or rescuing in the first place. You don't blow off your own real and legitimate priorities because you'd rather distract yourself or make yourself feel better about yourself "right now"...
Do I make my point? I hope so. You don't "owe" anybody your time, efforts, or energies because they thought to contact you first, second, or 32nd! Neither do other people, places, or things "owe" you experiences to make yourself feel good or better about yourself. There are other, more functional ways, to improve the quality of your inner life. And it is not at the expense of yourself...or other people. Newsflash: a "thing" to make you feel better fast may include those four beers or glasses of wine after work each day...that bucket of KFC....hitting up the casino for a couple of hours...going shopping....smoking that blunt...etc. etc. etc! If you want to get deep into it, it may also mean going home and starting a fight with your significant other so you don't have to "deal" with him or her the rest of the night. Think about THAT! ;-)
Some people are old skool about the tool they use to create and maintain their own life schedule. I, myself, have a detailed weekly planner I picked up at Office Depot for $25. It breaks down my day beginning at 7:00AM in 15 minute increments until 9:30PM. I can merely write in what I've got to do or have going on during any given day--and can instantly see what blocks of time are open for me throughout the day. I can also open up my planner and see at a glance my entire week from any given Monday through Sunday. That's what works for me. Someone else might choose to use their smartphone app. Others, a small notebook to jot down their necessary personal errands and social obligations for the week separate and apart from their work and device-related planner. Whatever you use to keep your life schedule going and current is your own choice.
Structure makes us feel safe. This is true whether we are 5 years old or 55 years old. Structure is what keeps us cruising within our own lane on a day to day basis. Nobody is SO disciplined that they are capable of mentally remembering everything they need to be doing on any given day. That would be delusional just sayin'.
Life scheduling is our friend. It truly is. If you need help with motivating yourself to pursue this process, that's what I'm here for. As the old saying goes, if nothing changes---nothing changes!